I was never truly present. As I fucked my wife I stared at the pillow that a week before had MD's wet mark all over it. I knew she owned me, in a way she owned my wife too. Nothing she could do compared to MD. I grew frustrated, with myself, with her, with the situation. Finally MD sent me a message. So, slut? Distracted? it read. I was angry with her but you'd never know by the pathetic begging in my txt, begging for more, begging for validation, begging to know how much she got off on what she did to me. begging to know anything, MD gave nothing aware, she txt me at random then would disappear again, I wouldn't hear from her for days. This went on for the next month. During that time the guilt built. I stood in my bedroom with my wife, aroused at the memories that were created there, aroused at the thought of her. I was still completely obsessed with her, checking my phone, I could see the affect on my family. I wanted to punish MD for that, I wanted to hold her down like I used to. We climbed aboard an' hurried out to where the nigger was lyin'.We left Mary Elizabeth in the wagon while we both slid down to see what we could do fer the nigger. The first thing Jane did wuz ta give him a big dose of laudanum. Right then, he wuz too badly injured ta worry 'bout opium addiction. It didn't take long fer the laudanum ta take effect, an' the nigger went ta sleep.Jane washed the dirt an' trash ofen his wounds an' we bandaged him up as best we could. We hoisted the nigger up ta the edge of the gully an' then ta the wagon. It wuz a damned good thin' that he wuz knocked out by the laudanum, cuz the rough handlin' we wuz forced ta give him would of hurt like hell. We finally got him lyin' more or less comfortably in the wagon an' covered with a few more blankets. Jane an' Mary Elizabeth rode in the back of the wagon with him while I drove back ta the house. I drove as carefully as I could, but I couldn't he'p bouncin' around some.While I drove back ta the house, we talked.
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